4 Years

It's officially been 4 years since we began our forever.

I tried to think of the moment that I fell in love with David...

Maybe it was when we made paper boats and attempted to float them down the ditches in Cedar. Maybe it was when we went hiking....and I tripped...sending us both sliding down the mountain. I ripped my pants...and was covered it mud...yet he didn't hesitate to hold my mud caked hand. Maybe it was the way he would bring Star Wars fruit snacks to class. Maybe it was his sense of adventure....or love of superheros. Maybe it was seeing his hilarious dance moves in the car.  Maybe it was the way he talked about his family....and how he clearly adored them. Maybe it was when he told me all about his heart...the past...and the unknowns of the future.

I can't pinpoint the exact moment....all I know is that it happened. Before I knew it, I couldn't imagine a day....month...year...or life that didn't include him.

I know 4 years is a mere ripple in time...

Yet in some ways, it feels as if we have lived a lifetime in these 4 short years.

In 4 years, we have moved 8 times. We have lived in 3 different states.  We have met and became friends with some of the most incredible people. David became Dr. Brown. We welcomed the most beautiful little girl into our lives...and sailed some of the toughest waters with her....until the moment we had to let her sails take her home again. We've made some of life's hardest decisions. We have got through 3 heart surgeries for David. We planted our roots in St. George. And...we most recently welcomed our sweet boy into our world.

(Shout out to the amazing Ora Despain...I always love looking at our wedding pictures because of her!)

I'm a different person then I was 4 years ago in so many ways....there is so much that I may be uncertain of at times.....but one thing that has never wavered is my love for David.

He is my anchor in every way. He believes in me when I don't believe in myself. He is patient. He has the most gentle and selfless soul in the world....(even though he would disagree). He is the least judgmental person I know

He is determined...and has a huge sense of duty to do the right thing. He has held me together numerous times as I have fallen apart in his arms. He has always been there to tightly hold my hand...keeping me tethered...especially on the days when I feel like I'm drowning in waters of anxiety or depression. He can wordlessly remind me that we are always in this together.

As we have became parents....he is always center stage with me...whether it is blow out diapers, sleepless nights, or countless bedtime songs.

He loves Adalyn endlessly....Each and every day of her life he whispered to her how special she was. He sang so many songs....and danced around with her when all she wanted was to be held. Watching his father heart ache for his angel daughter has been  the most painfully beautiful thing my eyes have ever seen.

Seeing him with Camon is much the same. I often hear him from the other room making up silly stories....or bringing comfort when Camon has a melt down from burping. His love for both of them is constant.

He has the quirkiest sense of humor....and never fails to make me laugh.

Is he perfect? No. He isn't. Sometimes he gets road rage. He has been known to steal my pillow at night. He saves containers of food with a tiny bite left in them. At times, he wears outfits that are completely mismatched. We disagree at times...and we can both be stubborn.

He is perfect for me though.

He is the most genuinely good person I have ever met. Never once have I wondered how David feels for me.

He showed me what it is to be loved completely...without bounds or conditions.

So here is to you, my dear, thank you for loving me...on both the stormy days...and the sunny days. Being married to you has helped me to become more of who I want to be. Thank you for loving Adalyn and Camon... they are the luckiest in the world! I'm grateful each day that you are ours. There is no one else I would want to spend my forever with. Now...to count down the hours til you get home from work!!

Oh Camon...your faces kill me! 

This song has always summed up my feelings for you!